We Need to Talk About Spiritual Abuse in Our Community
Your safety is our greatest concern. We Need to Talk About Spiritual Abuse in Our Community
Confronting Spiritual Abuse in Our Communities
Asalamualaikum Beloved Community Members,
In light of troubling recent events of spiritual abuse across the country, MCC joins our national discussion on this challenging topic to ferret out spiritual predators in the Muslim community and protect our communities, particularly our children.
Shaykh Rami Nsour and Sidi Shaan Mukhtar, passionate local congregation members helping our community understand this type of abuse, will lead this conversation.
Parents: Please join us for practical and spiritual tools to talk about this type of abuse with your children.
The national discourse in the Muslim community on this topic prompts this discussion. Alhamdulliah, no spiritual abuse incident has happened at MCC.
The MCC Board will also update you on additional precautionary security measures we are implementing to ensure our community center remains a safe space for everyone, especially children.
This important education night is from 7 p.m. to 9 p.m. on Friday, Dec. 13. Please mark your calendars. You can join us in person or watch live virtually.
Spiritual abuse is quite common in our communities and is often missed because of our inability to see it and correct it. Its also missed because of the shame associated with abuse. It ends with awareness and action.
What is Spiritual Abuse?
This is when individuals misuse their authority within religious settings to manipulate, control, or harm others. This leaves deep and lasting impacts on the victim by shaking the foundation of their faith. Some victims feel disconnected from the very beliefs meant to bring peace and healing.
In addition to this awareness event, here are steps that MCC is taking to ensure that our center provides a safe environment for every member of our community:
- Any new hire is required to complete a background and reference check (our Sunday School volunteers also currently get background checked);
- Addressing these topics candidly in Jumu'ah Khutbahs (Friday sermons);
- As mandatory reporters, requiring staff and volunteers to take training for misconduct prevention and identification;
- In collaboration with our mental health partner Maristan, MCC will hold healing circles;
- No counseling of the opposite gender will take place in a closed space at MCC or without a Mahram present;
- Meetings between opposite genders must not occur in closed spaces but in public, open spaces, such as rooms with open doors and visible windows. No Imam, Shaykh, or staff member is exempt from this policy. We require all children under 18 to be supervised at all times;
- Increased security and video surveillance around the facility;
- MCC thoroughly vets the background of new speakers, presenters, and Khateebs before giving them a platform to deliver their message;
- We will host an educational family night for parents, Sunday school teachers, and staff on safety measures and recognizing misconduct.
Please do not leave children unattended at the facility. Please pick up your child on time after their class, halaqa, or activity ends, and only drop them off early with parental supervision.
If you see any misconduct, please don't hesitate to reach us at
[email protected]
Resources For Healing, Support & Recovery
- Maristan offers specialized programs and support for individuals affected by spiritual abuse. Maristan has a counseling office at MCC.
- The Hurma Project Dedicated to safeguarding the sanctity of individuals within religious spaces.
- In Shaykhs Clothing an organization dedicated to helping Muslims understand and recover from spiritual abuse.
- The FYIs Spiritual Abuse Toolkit Provides guidance and resources for identifying and healing from spiritual abuse.
- Stanford Muslim Mental Health and Islamic Psychology Lab: Psychological Sequelae of Spiritual Abuse Research and insights into the psychological impact of spiritual abuse.
Spiritual Abuse Resources
- Insights into the Psychology of Spiritual Abuse: A paper co-authored by Dr. Rania Awaad on the psychology of spiritual misuse.
- Preventing Child Abuse: What Can You Do?: The trauma, secrecy, and shame for victims and tips for parents to help prevent sexual abuse within our community.
- Information on Mandatory Reporting: Certain community members/professionals are legally bound to report child abuse and neglect concerns.
Sidi Shaan Mukhtar gave a Khutbah in Walnut Creek last Friday, giving spiritual and practical insights about how we need to talk about spiritual abuse in the Muslim community.
Even though MCC aims to implement policies to safeguard those attending classes and programs at the facility, we can only do this with your help.
Please help us ensure that our children remain safe by reporting any concerns about misconduct, volunteering, and talking to your children at home about proper personal boundaries.
From our friends at Maristan:
Assalamu Alaykum wa rahmatullahi wa barakatuhu,
In light of recent events, we at Maristan feel it is crucial to address the importance of creating safe, respectful spaces for spiritual and personal growth. Spiritual abusewhen individuals misuse their position of authority within religious settings to manipulate, control, or harm othershas deep and lasting impacts. This form of abuse not only damages individuals but can also shake the foundation of their faith, leading some to feel disconnected from the very beliefs meant to bring peace and healing.
We believe that accountability is essential in addressing these harms. Those who inflict such abuse must be held responsible, not only to support victims but also to protect the integrity of our communities. Its important to remember that no single person defines our faith. Faith is rooted in compassion, justice, and kindness, and these values should guide how we respond to spiritual abuse and the structures we build to prevent it.
Spiritual abuse can leave lasting psychological impacts, including:
- Moral Confusion: The disorienting confusion that arises when one witnesses a religious figure partaking in harmful behaviors.
- Trauma Bonds: A powerful emotional bond that victims may develop with their abuser, complicating their ability to separate from the abuse.
- Nonresistance to Prolonged Abuse*:* A tendency to endure prolonged harm due to the authority figures status.
- Failure to Report Abuse: Victims often face feelings of fear, guilt, or isolation, making it difficult to seek help.
If you or someone you know is struggling with the effects of spiritual abuse, please know that you are not alone. There are resources, safe spaces, and support systems to help you heal, reclaim your well-being, and find safety. At Maristan, we are committed to fostering environments where trust and compassion form the foundation, and where every individual can feel secure in their faith journey and personal well-being.
Resources for Healing and Support:
- The Hurma Project Dedicated to safeguarding the sanctity of individuals within religious spaces.
- The FYIs Spiritual Abuse Toolkit Provides guidance and resources for identifying and healing from spiritual abuse.
- Stanford Muslim Mental Health and Islamic Psychology Lab: Psychological Sequelae of Spiritual Abuse Research and insights into the psychological impact of spiritual abuse.
If you have any questions or need additional support, please dont hesitate to reach out to us at Maristan. Lets work together to foster compassionate, accountable spaces for all.
About Us
Muslim Community Center East Bay (MCC) is a faith-based community hub that promotes the unity of God through service, education, and inspiration.
We are privileged to serve the 90,000+ Muslims in the East Bay community.
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Muslim Community Center - East Bay
5724 W Las Positas Blvd #300, Pleasanton, CA 94588
(925) 485-1786 Contact Us